Wednesday, November 30, 2005


Some thoughtful thoughts forwarded to me this morning...

#1...Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteriesare getting weak?
#2... Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they knowthere is no money in the account?
#3...Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billionstars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
#4...Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
#5...Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
#6...Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
#7...Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when youthrow a revolver at him?
#8...Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
#9...Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
#10..If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
#11..Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubblesare always white?#12..Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
#13..Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes thatsomething new to eat will have materialized?
#14..Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with theirvacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it downto give the vacuum one more chance?
#15..Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?
#16..How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
#17..When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with ashopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's allright?" Well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "That hurt, youstupid idiot?"
#18..Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's fallingoff the table you always manage to knock something else over?
#19..In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summerwhen we complained about the heat?
#20..How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
#21..If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try it like your wifetold you to do it?
#22..And obviously if at first you don't succeed, then don't take up skydiving!
And my FAVORITE......
#23...The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons issuffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three bestfriends, if they're okay, then it's you

1 comment:

Amanda said...

"#11. Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?"

Ooo, ooo! I have CRITICAL NEW INFO on this one. I just read about this in the Metro on the way to St. Paul's for the Thankgiving Day service:

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