Emergency Question for People With Style

It seems Facebook no longer has that handy little function whereby you could address a question to all of your FB friends. And people, I GOT A QUESTION!

Actually, it is more a cry for help.

I have a shoe phobia. I HATE HATE HATE to shop for shoes. It always feels to me that the Exact Right pair of shoes is just around the corner, that if I only keep looking I will find the pair that answers all points: narrow enough, comfortable enough, black enough (of course, ONLY black!), classic enough (but with the right amount of au courant about them), durable enough to last the hours on the job, affordable enough. And of course the Holy Grail of Shoes would be those that make my feet look like a cute Size 7, instead of Size Gigantor.

The Payless solution (many shoes, all under $20) is not one that works for me. My large, skinny feet just do not work in a cheap shoe! There is perhaps the TJMaxx solution, whereby you troll the stores looking for Ultimate Shoes on clearance. But folks, I do NOT have the time to be shopping for 'perhaps' - besides, the savings on the shoes would go directly back to the babysitter who's watching the kids whilst I troll.

Some of you may have heard my apocryphal story about finding a STORE filled with Ultimate Shoes in Rome. Never before or since have I had a retail experience like it. Every pair I tried on was perfect! Every pair I tried on was comfortable! Every pair I tried on was gorgeous! I tried to convince Torbjorn I needed the boots AND the shoes - we settled on a fabulous pair of slingbacks. The prices were in lire: who is to know what 90 jillion lire adds up to in British pounds? I sailed out of the store holding the gorgeous shopping bag proudly. And then the AmEx bill showed up: $450 dollars (225 GBP). [c'mon, GASP with me here.] WHAT?!?!?

I had never heard of Sergio Rossi before that day, but my world view changed that fateful September afternoon in 2001. I now know there IS a place in the world that sells the Ultimate Shoes, all day every day. I would just need to re-mortgage my home and sell one of my children to afford them. But I'll tell you something, dear readers: I have worn and worn and worn those shoes. Re-soled them countless times. Worn them to interviews, church, restaurants, baptisms, clubs, you name it. For SEVEN YEARS. That is quite something for a mere slip of a slingback, with a whisper of leather round the back and a narrow point of calfskin around the front.

But the time has come [cue sad sad violin music] to retire the Sergio Rossis. They have served their mistress well, and Kirsten is FORCED, forced I tell you, to find the next go-to pair of dress shoes. And here is my question for the people out there who know about these things [Eileen, I'm thinking about you here]:

WHAT AM I GONNA GET? Where do I go? What do I look for? What is the absolute best shoe to get right now? Can't be too vertiginous (center of gravity shot after 3 pregnancies & a summer of flip flops). Can't be too trendy (looking to spend money I don't have, its gotta be worth it). Need to be sharp - nothing too mumsy. Must go with trousers as well as skirts, ideally even a nice pair of jeans, not that I own any.

HELP ME FRIENDS! I am this close to What Not To Wear, and the right shoe choice may keep me away from the edge.

I wait in breathless anticipation for your suggestions.